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I have worked for many companies that employees can be nominated and received service awards, I often have come across people over my career who have collected awards and it leaves you scratching your head how such an accomplishment should have happened. With this, I bring you the most backhanded Award Nomination, for this nomination we are using Ralph as the subject name (not a real subject).
Summary of award nomination:
I have worked with many customer support representatives over the year and have never worked with an employee more capable of causing more confusion than the customer originally reported in the first place. Ralph goes above and beyond in his commitment to confusing and misconstruing information and is more dedicated to his work that he raises the bar for all of his peers.
Over and over I have been dazzled with Ralph’s ability to not understand the most basic of problem explanations and he has worked hundreds of support calls barely able to provide even the most basic of assistance to all but a handful. Ralph’s commitment to mediocrity is admirable and he shows great enthusiasm for his career path and degree in ignorance.
Ralph has tested and helped other engineers become better technical writers by being able to make mistakes with even the most simple instruction documentations. His innate talent for finding a way to break or incorrectly apply any task he is assigned with has helped hone the support skills of several other staff members.
This is why Ralph is nominated for a customer support award, because without Ralph the rest of the customer support team wouldn’t be challenged as much which could lead to complacency.
-Justin Germino