Social Networking Phobia?
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Last weekend I was out at a birthday party for a friend over at AZCulture with my wife and it was at a Wine Bar in Scottsdale Arizona. While attending said event I was noting how much I find being in public crowds uncomfortable, I actually have a slight aversion to networking publicly and in person. Most of this comes from just simple phobia, I enjoy talking with people and socializing, I am just uncomfortable in public settings with crowds and lots of people around.
Online networking is so much easier, you can act naturally and you don’t have to be aware of your body language, how you dress, style of fashion…etc. You can just be recognized for your words and what you say instead of your overall appearance. This makes borderline recluse hermits like myself much more apt to talk to people on Twitter, Facebook or other social networks than meeting for drinks in a bar or club in the valley.
It isn’t that I don’t socialize fairly well, in my industry and when associating with people I am friendly, approachable, easy to talk to and often can add some value to just about any conversation without looking to steal focus or attention. It is just I am uncomfortable in my own skin in public, maybe its the nagging fear of always being judged or the self conscious way I analyze everything I say.
-Justin Germino
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Tags: facebook easier than in face, fear of crowds, fear of social networking, fear of social settings, Online Networking, Online Networking Easy, online or in person, public crowd fear, self conscious, social networking, Social Networking phobia, socialization, socializing on twitter, twitter socializing
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Interesting how you characterize your uncomfortable feeling in crowds, relating it to physical appearance and dress. I’d be very surprised from your blog picture and the character of your posts that you dress in anything but acceptable fashion and that you are more presentable than average. It is interesting how we will characterize our feelings of inferiority in different ways. You don’t say anything about difficulty speaking to others in the crowd or wondering what to say (which is my excuse for feeling uncomfortable). It’s amazing how hard we work to put ourselves down and why we do it. My suggestion is that you confront your excuse boldly and not accept it. If you think you make a bad appearance then get some new clothes or haircut but don’t let your own bad opinion of yourself stand.
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How I speak publicly also affects me, but for some reason my insecurity is around people staring and focusing on me, not what I sound like. I do conference call presentations over Live Meeting all the time and present all sorts of technical documents, discussion and host meetings for managers and dozens of staff every day. For me it is not even about my dress, I do dress in suit or dress clothing when in public, I am clean shaven and have a haircut when I spoke in CA World, it is just the all eyes staring at me, and being in public around people that makes me feel uncomfortable. I really can’t place why I feel the way I do, I just am that way.